Wedding Advice: The Dress

Planning timeline

I would buy this 9 months to a year in advance. Consider factors such as the time of year your wedding is - as a June bride I definitely needed to buy early! It also depends on if the dress has to be made or if it is off the rack. Buying a dress early is important for alterations, as most brides have 2-3 alteration appointments! I bought my dress in August 2010, they handcrafted it over 4 months and then it was ready in December 2010. I had my first alterations appointment in December 2010 (sweetheart neckline and 1--point bustle, my second appointment in March 2011 (taken in 1 1/2 inches), and my third appointment in May 2011 (5-point bustle added, some rouches pinned flat). My dress was then steamed and pressed before I came to pick it up -- if you leave it at the salon generally you pick it up 2-3 days in advance. With a wild wolfdog you bet I left it there!

Suggestions

-Set a budget for this and try your best to stay in it! Warning: this is difficult! Consultants will try to put you in a more expensive gown and the fact is... you'll probably want it! This is one area where I went over my initial budget. The best way to avoid this though is to NOT try on the dresses outside your budget or it will be too tempting. Looking back on this, I don't regret getting the dress I did, but then again this is pretty much a one-time wear item (well, I'll be doing one more shoot!) so don't blow your entire budget on it!

-Try on dresses with a few different people. I went 3 times before purchasing, once with my mom, then with a few bridesmaids and the GBF (gay best friend), and then the mother in-law. By the end of each visit they all decided the dress was the dress, despite some worthy contenders.

-Take pictures!! This is so so important because you'll want to look at them later and see how you look in the dresses from different angles. Imagine yourself at the venue... does it fit in with the big picture? Also, something I found interesting - note your expressions in the pictures. I looked so much happier in the dress, it was undeniable. Some salons - particularly boutiques that sell a lot of dresses - will not let you take pictures (at least one of the brands probably does not allow it). I refused to get a dress from there, it reeeally helps to see the pictures later or you might get dress regret!

-Color? What do you mean, color - isn't there only white? Guess what -- my dress is not white! Ha, it's ivory. If you are getting married outdoors I highly recommend ivory, in intense sunlight or flash white will GLOW (not in a good way). This still happened to me a little but not as much as if my had been white. When I say glow I mean everything looks so white you lose details in your pictures. No bueno. I also like ivory because it is a little softer and sweeter. I also tried on a pink dress (very cool but I had to go a little bit traditional) and now beige is becoming pretty trendy. Too scared to do a different color? Try a colored sash. Vera Wang makes some awesome dresses with black sashes (think the bride in The Hangover).

-Lastly, try on all different shapes & styles! I bought a fit-to-flare, but if you had asked me before I went I never though I would have gotten this type dress, I thought it was better for curvier girls - turned out it gave me curves and made me look more womanly (the sweetheart neckline helped with this too). I drowned in A-line styles though... I looked 12! And with everything on grass a mermaid style was too difficult to maneuver in. See what is most comfortable and flattering on you.

Trying on the dress in Summer 2010

First fitting in December 2010 - wearing a dress (my dress!) that fits!



This was actually a group favorite, it had little textured polka dots on it.

But definitely not funky enough for me! However, a little more slimming/tight on the body.



Bustles 101

Okay, here goes on catching up on a million posts!

This winter break I had my first fitting. Because the gown was cut to fit me, it was a perfect match. So my two main reasons for going were for (1) I was adding in a sweetheart neckline and (2) I needed to have my dress bustled.

[buhs-uhl]

A pulling up of fabric at the back of a dress where the bodice meets the skirt. Many trains may be bustled so they are out of the way at the reception.

There are many types of bustles to go with, and they can add their own stylistic flair to a dress. Usually the Maid of Honor (MOH) is in charge of helping the bride bustle her dress post-ceremony.

1 point bustle

The most simple and inexpensive. Can be over-bustled (left) or under-bustled (right). This is a very full bustle and should only be used on light fabrics because it is notorious for breaking with heavier fabrics like satin.

Another 1 point under-bustle

3 point bustle

The 3 point bustle spreads out the train more than the 1 point, and is more expensive but better at holding up heavier fabrics (see an overbustle below).

The French Bustle

This is a more complicated bustle, and is great for delicate and heavy fabrics -- a definite wow factor (but not too crazy)! This bustle has anywhere from 2-25 points, making it a bit more pricey. 

The Double and Triple French Bustle

Sometimes known as the "whipped cream" bustle -- for a good reason. Very dramatic and has a victorian charm -- my thoughts exactly on what a bride of Mr. Darcy would wear!

The Ballroom Bustle

This bustle is meant to create the illusion that there is no train to the dress. This tends to be pretty secure and is good for long trains.

The Australian Bustle

This bustle is becoming a new trend, it makes use of a pull and loop system of ribbons similar to window shades.

What about me? Actually, just a 1 point bustle. I hadn't done "bustle" research beforehand and my seamstress offered me 1 point and 3 point. 3 point pulls more fabric up and out for a fuller look, so my dress looked shorter. Having a fit-to-flare style, I have a semi-wide train area, so I didn't want it to look really short and full. I opted for a 1 point to retain a little length on my train (don't step on it! ;). It blends in really nicely, which I liked since I am not the biggest fan of bustles in general. Because of the very decorated nature of the bottom of my dress (that's all I'm going to say, most of my friends have seen it already) it has the effect of a ballroom bustle. I'm happy with it!

My dress is almost ready for fitting!

I just received notice that my veil has arrived in Atlanta and my dress will arrive in next week! For the past four months, it has been hand-crafted just for me; every segment has been hand-cut, pinned, and then stitched together exactly to my dimensions. I am so excited to try on my dress -- one that will actually fit without the need for giant clamps (all gowns in a store come in a "sample size," usually of 8 or 10. They will use clamps if the dress is too small or too big). Eek... I hope I still love it as much as I did over the summer, I always hear stories of people not liking their dress the second time around. I'm not too worried about it, though. Hopefully it won't need many more alterations, because the price for that can ADD UP!

Caroline Wedding Update: Colors and a Dress!

Okay, so I have posted in the past that I chose my colors -- pink and burgundy. It is one thing to pick colors... it is another thing to match them to colors offered by bridal salons! And colors look different online than in person -- beware! I was having trouble finding the exact shades of pink and burgundy that I liked. I then floated in between pinks and purples, finding myself hovering over a deep lapis purple for a while, which I did truly like. But there are less options when it comes to purple flowers and I love pink flowers -- it was a conundrum.

I decided to put that aside and shop for my own dress. I went to a very nice bridal salon (which will remain unnamed) and found so many dresses that I loved. And let me tell you -- not everyone has a "Eureka!" moment. I didn't. With every new dress I would try on, I'd think of how it could shape the theme of the wedding. Do I want something classy and ultra-formal for a nighttime wedding, or something a bit aery-er and light, perfect for a garden wedding? It was a tough choice, but I ended up going with an organza dress and a cathedral veil (longer than I am tall!) so it's perfect for a garden wedding, but it still has the high drama for a nighttime wedding. Plus, its not your typical dress. It's a piece of art and nothing ordinary. You will not see someone in a dress like this again. It's perfect.

Anyways, I am going to get my bridesmaid dresses from the same store I am getting my dress from. Because I kept thinking the pink bridesmaid dresses I was finding were too dark or too "bubblegum-y" (for lack of a better word), I decided to look away from pink. Burgundy, on the other hand, was too drab and dark for summer. That's when it hit me that I needed something that was neither of these colors.

That's how I came to pewter. Yep, gray. What is more boring and drab than gray, right? BUT with a black four tulle rose sash that ties in a bow in the back - the dresses are the epitome of elegance and are very dramatic, and will be against the garden scene with pink and burgundy flowers. I fell in love. The one thing I told myself I wanted to avoid when getting married this young was having a very youthful bright wedding. I want something mature and extremely elegant, and very formal. Not something playful. Something dramatic with flair. I think I have found that!

Since my dress has some elements of flower petals and/or feathers (depends on how you look at it) I think I am going to play up on the soft, romantic, yet rustic garden look... and have maybe some bird motifs and/or antique bird cages to hold flowers, cards, and candles.

Wedding dress shopping!

So I think I may have found THE dress... (FYI not the one above!). It's been Mom, Dad, and friend approved! And let me tell you... you will never see someone wearing a dress like it! No, its not custom made, but its very intricately detailed, a bit over the top (no surprise there), and oh so gorgeous. It's a fit-to-flare style - something I thought would never go with my non-curvalicious body. BUT it actually helped me not look like I am 12! Since it is so crazy I will probably go with a very plain veil with no trim, or a flower in my hair. I am hoping to go to the salon (which shall remain unnamed!) in Atlanta and try it on for the FMIL!

Say Yes! to the Dress

There are a million options when it comes to dresses - you can choose your neckline, your silhouette, the fabric used, the style, embellishments... the list goes on. I will break down the options first, then show some pictures of my favorite styles.

Neckline

Off-the-Shoulder

One Shoulder

Assymetric

Scoop

Tank

V-neck

Halter

Strapless

Sweatheart

Sleeve/Cap Sleeve

High Neck

Silhouette

A-Line

Empire Waist

Drop Waist

Slim/Column

Ball Gown

Short

Trumpet

Mermaid

Princess

Fabric

Charmeuse

Faille

Linen

Razmir

Silk Organza

Chiffon

Garza

Mikado

Taffeta

Satin

Cotton/Twill

Georgette

Tulle

Shantung

Crepe de Chine

Lace

Organza

Silk

Style

Classic

Romantic

Whimsical

Tailored

Glamorous

Modern

Embellishments

Sequins

Fake Pearls

Rhinestones

Lace Detailing

Fabric Flowers

Bows

etc.

What I like!

-Sweetheart and One Shoulder necklines

-A-Line and Empire Waist silhouettes (can't overwhelm my small frame!)

-Satin, Silk, Silk Organza, Organza, Charmeuse, and (surprisingly) lace fabrics

-Romantic styles have seem to draw me in (over modern, which also surprised me)

-I like Fabric Flowers in moderation, especially on the bodice or on the strap of a one shoulder

-I really like lace, so if I don't have it as a main fabric I might want lace detailing - its just so classic

Lace Strapless with Rhinestone Detailing on the Bodice

One Shoulder with Fabric Flower Detailing on Waist

Designer Dresses: Simone Carvalli

So far I'd have to say Simone Carvalli is my favorite dress designer. I'm also pretty certain about how I want my dress to look: a sweetheart strapless with intricate detailing on the backside. I also want a dress with a train. Not too too long though, because that'd probably overwhelm my small frame. I am also thinking about going for an ivory dress as opposed to white. Here is an example of one of my favorite Simone dresses.

Wedding Dress Chic: The short dress

While the traditional long dress can never be trumped, I am really into the newer short styles that thousands of brides are swapping as their reception wear. Much easier to dance in, the short dress is an obvious choice. Plus you get to pick TWO wedding dresses! My dream outfit is in the current issue of InStyle Weddings donned by the lovely Jaime Pressly... a sweet style, perhaps with an oversized bow (or detail not seen in the actual dress) with one of those cutesy little face veils (I'm definitely going with a long veil for the wedding - so romantic). I feel like I can't represent all the different facets of my personality in just one dress, so with the shorter reception dress I can show off another side, a more cutesy youthful style. I'll try to scan in that picture later!